Here is a listing of bogus tour dates from the 1985 Stupid Tour tour shirt.
| Jun 20 | La Brea Tar Pits | Los Angeles, California |
| Jun 21 | Rotary Club Luncheon | Shakopee, Minnesota |
| Jun 22 | Fast Don's Bowl-A-Rama | Warwick, Rhode Island |
| Jun 28-29 | Mean Uncle Leroy's Spam Closet | Des Moines, Iowa |
| Jul 4 | Lucky Eddie's Racquetball Court & Oriental Massage Parlor | Buffalo, New York |
| Jul 6-7 | Bob & Edna's Quiche Emporium | Chicago, Illinois |
| Cancelled | Gordon's Bar Mitzvah | Denver, Colorado |
| Jul 13 | Billy Bob's Chili Pit | Albuquerque, New Mexico |
| Jul 14 | Grover Washington Jr. High School | Grand Island, Nebraska |
| Jul 21-25 | Happy Hour Show -- Sizzler's #3 | Superior, Wisconsin |
| Aug 9-10 | Bob's Laund-O-Rama Grand Opening | Dallas, Texas |
| Aug 11-17 | Mr. Frank's House of Pancakes and Bondage | San Francisco, California |
| Aug 23 | Crazy Louie's Tofu Bar | Charlotte, North Carolina |
| Aug 24 | House of Clams | Kansas City |
| Sep 4 | Pizza World | Phoenix, Arizona |
| Sep 5-Oct 5 | Shea Stadium | New York City |